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To Begin With Mary Oliver

          To Begin With, The Sweet Grass by Mary Oliver Evidence, 2009   1. Will the hungry ox stand in the field and not eat of the sweet grass? Will the owl bite off its own wings? Will the lark forget to lift its body in the air or forget to sing? Will the rivers run upstream?   Behold, I say—behold the reliability and the finery and the teachings             of this gritty earth gift.   2. Eat bread and understand comfort. Drink water, and understand delight. Visit the garden where the scarlet trumpets             are… Read More »


You’re Nervous Standing in Front?

Meditating so you're not nervous standing in front of people

How many of us do you believe DON’T get nervous standing in front of people? Professional speakers? Teachers?  Can you repeat after me: “I shall not place anyone on a pedestal.” Being in the public eye Many couples tell me they’re really nervous about their wedding because they intensely dislike being in the public eye. So okay. I get that. I’m so used standing in front of people to make a presentation that I AM used to it. But the “IT” is being nervous. It’s not that it doesn’t happen, but I’ve learned to manage the nervousness.  I appreciate you… Read More »


What to Look for When You’re Exploring Venues

exploring venues

Exploring Venues After “Yes, I’ll marry you,” is spoken, a list of to do’s begins to pile up in your head. One of the first is choosing a site to hold your ceremony, and often, hold your reception afterwards. You are on your way to exploring venues.  From vineyards to barns, beaches to forests, art galleries to VFW halls, the area I live in is abundant with beautiful venues and wedding sites. Being an Officiant in Northern Michigan means I’m always surrounded by great beauty.  A First Time Site Every year I get to go to another location I’ve never… Read More »


What’s the Difference Between Officiants?

Difference between Officiants

What’s the Difference Between Officiants? If you’re answering the question, “What’s the difference between officiants?” it starts with the range of beliefs and values that varies from officiant to officiant. Each of us do what we do for our own reasons. There’s those who were asked to lead a friend or family member’s wedding and said, however reluctantly or excitedly, “Yes!” (If that’s up your alley, see my program for new officiants). How Some of Us Came to the Profession Some of us came into marrying people because of church affiliation and it was part of our job. Others are… Read More »


Your Friendiant- Pluses & Minuses

Are you looking for a professional Officiant? Or do you have a Friendiant?  Here are some minuses — and pluses of the latter! First of all, let me cut to the chase. Don’t make this event — your wedding ceremony — TOO CASUAL. As a culture, a society, we’re definitely moving into a time of challenging norms and reinventing roles. But there are some norms that deserve preserving (wow a rhyme!) One of them is the brevity (and yes, of course, the joy) of the event. By the way, a Friendiant is a friend or family member who’s been asked… Read More »


Little Love Teachers

Children

  (You can listen to Rev Crystal read this blog post and multitask to your heart’s content!) What’s the single most wonderful thing about having children? Narrowing it down to one characteristic might be pretty difficult, but let’s give it a go anyway. I’ve never had children so I’m asking you what you think. My first guess is they are little love teachers. Bring Out the Softness Alicia explained how her young daughter is a comfort to her as she adjusts to the passing on of  her grandmother she was so close to. Her son will tell her out of… Read More »


Don’t Let Regret Ruin Your Future

  Every morning I go through the same ritual. I write what I appreciate, evidence of what’s going well, 5 things I need to do that day, and how I want to show up (energetic, loving, smart, prosperous, etc). Then I write out what I want my life to look like, kinda like my personal screen play. In addition, since my mother passed on in December of 2017, I choose a card from The Soul’s Journey Lesson Cards by James Van Praagh (JVP). JVP communicates with those who have passed on. I like to think because James is tuned into… Read More »


Ritual of Unity — Sand Ceremony

Traditional Ritual of Unity A traditional ritual of unity is the Candle Lighting Ceremony used in many weddings. The lighting of two candles represents the individual light of each person. The couple lights one large pillar with their individual candles to represent their coming together in one light. However, when a ceremony is held outdoors, wind can be unpredictable. Candles can be easily blown out. No Lights Out A Unity Sand Ceremony can take place regardless of the wind or weather. Because Sand is such a flexible medium a couple isn’t faced with the question, “Does this mean the light… Read More »


First Look Pros and Cons

  A First Look  The First Look is a scheduled time for a couple to see each other all put together and ready prior to the ceremony taking place. First Looks are a break from tradition, and you have to weigh the pros and the cons. Before deciding if you want to take this unconventional break, consider these do’s and don’ts. An Intimate Moment Together Alone The wedding day is filled with moments…being walked down the aisle…exchanging rings…dances…speeches… hugs and kisses…and everyone who attends your wedding will want time with you. You may wave at your new spouse from across the room more… Read More »


In the Midst

This stained glass nativity scene was created by my mother some 20 years ago. She was truly talented, making many gorgeous art pieces throughout her life. I live in the midst of her art in my home. She surrounds me not only in her art, but because we are bonded, mind, body and soul. It’s a deep bond as I’m sure you know from your own life. In the Midst A year ago this month, I was sitting next to my mother as she was making her exit from this world. She was 93 when she finally let go on… Read More »


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