Take a break from perfection

Break from perfection  I’ve seen it happen too many times:  Brides and Grooms want everything to be perfect. Then —  they get picky with each other. Demanding or even withdrawn from friends and family.  They may suffer from DIOMO (Do It on My Own) Loose sleep and precious time together that they’ll never get back.  Truthfully, the only thing I know of to avoid wedding planning tension and the stressful disconnect from loving each other is to elope and have a little wedding. But even an elopement must be thought through. Wedding blues Oh man, I love weddings, big, small… Read More »


The power of the compliment

Hear the power of a compliment I love to hear this:  “After our ceremony was over, multiple people commented on what a wonderful job [Rev Crystal] did. ” Or “Reverend Crystal was incredible! Everyone in our wedding party commented on how she did an amazing job.” And dare I toot my horn just a bit more: “I had so many people come up to me and my husband complimenting us on how beautiful our ceremony was, and how it spoke to who we are. From the devote Catholic guests to the not so religious, everyone enjoyed our ceremony.”   Happy as… Read More »


Who “Should” Walk a Bride Down the Aisle?

walked down the aisle

Walked Down the Aisle When Lauren walked down the aisle at her wedding with 14 attendants, and 250 guests, her brother escorted her down her once in a lifetime entrance. Although her father sat in the first row, he’d never been a big part of her life, nor a very positive force in her life.   Despite the “shoulds” she’d been subjected to and which you can read your own emphasis into, (“He’s your FATHER!  He should walk you down the aisle,”) Lauren decided to forego tradition. Instead she picked the person who’d been by her side, comforted and laughed… Read More »


What’s Short and Sweet mean to you?

Short and Sweet

You have something in mind when you ask me for a short and sweet ceremony Often a couple will tell me in their first email they want a simple, short and sweet ceremony. I used to make assumptions about what that meant.  Short translated to about 5 minutes long and sweet meant romantic. Short and sweet is relative  But if the couple was from a Catholic background, short meant about 30 – 45 minutes because they’re used to long masses with kneeling and standing and singing and responsive readings, etc. A Catholic mass takes time to get through. Likewise, a… Read More »


Twists on Traditions

Twists on Traditions video snapshot

Contemporary Twists on Traditions You’ve heard that every couple should have something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue? Well, The Knot Magazine, Michigan — Fall, 2019, has a fun article about new twists on traditions. And I’m all in! Couples don’t HAVE to stick with the super traditional any longer. Creating your own twists on traditions can make your wedding truly one of a kind from start to finish. A bride’s gown doesn’t have to be a ballgown. I’m not a fan of too sexy, but some brides are all about sexy, and as long as grandma won’t faint,… Read More »


Relationship Commandment #1

Keep dating

#1 — You must keep dating By the time your wedding rolls around, you will have a pile of memories to build on.  A good Officiant will draw from those memories you’ve shared and set them out as a gift to your guests for them to draw on.  Over time, this pool of memories gets used and worn.  You must keep replacing these memories by making new ones.  Dating gave you the way to make memories.  Remember the date you went on that led to the first kiss? The first time you made love? The time you left each other… Read More »


Pick your battles #2 commandment

Picking how you battle

Commandment #2  Don’t pick your battles, pick the way you’ll work through them. When you live with someone, you learn what not to talk about and what subjects are safe to bring up. Don’t talk about sex with your parents, keep away from politics with your mother’s brother. If you comment to your best friend that she was late again for your lunch meeting, she might give you the cold shoulder for a week or so. Not the best communicator, is she? Or IS she? When you live with anyone for a long period of time, disagreements are bound to… Read More »


Commandment #5 Relationship Contest

Relationship contest

 Create A Unique Relationship Contest So everyone loves to win a contest. This week’s Commandment #5 is Thou shalt create a unique relationship contest. The #5 Commandment as a contest is simple: See who can surprise the other with unexpected gifts the most. You and yours get to compete day after day after day for the fun of it! Showing up for this contest can make your marriage 100’s of times more alive and supportive. When I was in school, a mentor who was easily 25 years older than his wife told me about the relationship contest he and his… Read More »


Relationship Commandment #10!

Relationship Partnership

Your Relationship Partnership Developing a relationship partnership is Commandment #10. Expand your understanding of what a relationship and your partnership in marriage is. This video by Dhar Mann on Facebook says it all. This marks the end of the 10-part series on relationships I’ve been doing weekly. To see the other nine commandments, go to the Blog Link above, or click here. Please leave a comment below what your favorite relationship commandment is.  Love is why we’re here. To learn and grow and enjoy. This happens when we’re in a relationship partnership between equals, not one better than the other.… Read More »


What’s Your Name Mean? #9

Name games on the road

Listen to the blog: Relationship Commandment #9 —  Let Your Name Signify Your Goals How many of you traveled with your family as a kid? If you did your parents probably came quipped with name games or word games to keep you and your siblings and fur babies (hahaha) occupied between launch pad and destination. My folks and I loved name games. I vaguely remember a game about the last letter in a word meant you had to find a word that started with that letter. Matrix was a bingo, yahoo I win word most of the time. (I still… Read More »


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