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Married Couples: Think Big! #7

It’s so much fun to be in love. It makes you think bigger about yourself and what’s ahead of you. Even in the midst of all the activity – even though making so many planning decisions day after day – ones you never expected to have to make – can be exhausting – it’s still fun. You know you’re headed to your wedding day and a life of discovery, adventure, ups and downs and who knows what else? The mystery is part of it. Only a mystery with someone you love and loves you. And helps you Think Big! But there’s… Read More »


The Disguises of conditional love #6

See right not set right graphic in aqua blue

Who in the world would prefer conditional love over unconditional love? Yet most of us live by conditional love and think what we’re experiencing is unconditional love. Do you know what the definition of conditional love is? Care to take a poke at it? It’s giving approval and support to someone in exchange for prescribed behavior. In other words, if you say, do or act the way I want you to, I’ll love you. Here’s how you may have experienced conditional love growing up: “You’ve made me very upset.” “You make me so happy.” “When you do ______ you make me… Read More »


Commandment #4 — Do A Weekly Relationship Check In

relationship check in -- toe to toe

Most couples get married as they’re building their career. The kids are little. Bodies are changing. So you can get into a habit of passing each other by and not REALLY know what’s going on with each other. So Commandment  #4 is about setting up a weekly relationship check in with each other. Somewhat like dating, this is a time together that you guard with your life. It could be a ½ hour time period before you go to bed on a Friday night. Or over coffee on Sunday morning. There’s 4 questions to ask of each other What was the… Read More »


Commandment #3 — Your marriage relationship is Yours Alone

Sand ceremony

Commandment #3 –Your marriage relationship is yours alone. Together. It’s no one else’s. Symbolism Contained in the Sand One of the reasons I still love the Sand Ceremony is its symbolism. It’s not only the meaning of the grains of sand representing all the experiences, events, lessons and breakthroughs you’ve had in your life. What also strikes me about the Sand Ceremony is the uniqueness of the pattern that’s created when the two colors of sand blend. I don’t know what other officiants say when they lead this ceremony, but I always emphasize how there’s no other combination like the… Read More »


Married Couple Commandment #1

Married couple Jason and Laura

Married Couple Commandment #1. You must keep dating.  By the time your wedding rolls around, you will have a pile of memories to build on. A good Officiant will draw from those memories you’ve shared and set them out as a gift to your guests for them to draw on.  Over time, this pool of memories gets used and worn.  You must keep replacing these memories by making new ones.  Make More Memories Dating gave you the way to make memories. Remember the date you went on that led to the first kiss? The first time you made love? The time you… Read More »


Homestead Resort Awesomeness

My couple at the Homestead Resort, Jenna and Tom

Bay Mountain, Bay Mountain! The Homestead Resort’s Top of Bay Mountain is one of my favorite wedding locations. When my couple chooses Bay Mountain for the site, I know everyone will be doubly awed. Not only by the couple’s love for each other (and the ceremony I’ve prepped for them  😆 ) but by the awesome  view.  When people who’ve never experienced how beautiful Michigan is arrive at this site, the expansive view always knocks their socks off. Lake Michigan looks stunning from Bay Mountain! The Homestead has been undergoing some remodeling and upgrading technology changes which is always exciting!… Read More »


Seeing Eye to Eye

There is a way Yep, there IS a way of seeing eye to eye with the people who have their own hopes and dreams for your special day. When your hopes and theirs don’t blend well, there are ways to smooth the wedding planning process. From the day you break the good news, “We’re getting married,” to the day you wave good-bye to take time for just the two of you, harmony can prevail. Conflict can be effectively managed and transformed. Seeing eye to eye …Boils down to YOUR clarity and YOUR compassion. (We can never control another person’s perceptions,… Read More »


When A Wedding Team Truly Collaborates

Your wedding day will be awesome when your team truly collaborates. Check out this vimeo! Maire & Tyler from LM Visuals on Vimeo. Collaboration. What a wonderful experience. Is this what players feel when they’re on a football or baseball team? It’s truly infectious. In January I was honored to officiate for the wonderful couple who are featured in this video. Backstory Tyler and Maire had applied to win a contest where the services of 21 vendors (including me) were donated to the winning couple. $32,000 worth of wedding goodies and services. From event planning, video, photography, decorations, venue, beer,… Read More »


Stop Time on Your Wedding Day

 Ask your friend whose wedding day has come and gone, “What do you remember from your special day?” According to Reverend Clint Huff of the Wedding Ceremony Podcast a majority of brides will answer, “I don’t know. It was all kind of a blur.” It’s true, many people will want both of you and your new spouse’s attention. Congratulations will continue all evening long. Glasses get clanged in order to encourage you to stop eating, drinking or talking. And kiss. Your guests will share stories of their own wedding day. Then there’s the shared memories of being in school or… Read More »


Spiritual Laws of Relationship

spiritual laws

Creating a Spiritual Relationship When I first came across Paul Ferrini it was through a congregant who specialized in couple’s counseling and women’s issues. She assured me Ferrini’s reference to spiritual laws did NOT mean religious / theological expectations. There’s a distinction between the two. I’m pretty sure I went through the differences between spiritual and religious when we met to plan your ceremony. I can’t expect you to have hung on every word I said, so here it is again: There’s an unseen, non-judgmental, unconditionally loving energy that is the glue of the Universe. It is the essence of… Read More »


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