How to get more done without going crazy
Engaged couples, wedding stress is always in the room with you when this could be an awesome time for connection and excitement. Correct me if I’m wrong, but you face some unique stresses in a day and age when stress is high anyway. You have an extra set of details, decisions, and emotions to
manage even if you have one of our fabulous event planners from the Traverse City area organizing on your behalf.
But all is not lost.
Stress we collectively endure
Expert copywriter, Stephanie Fleming of Ready to Go Copy backed up the claim that life is pretty crazy with the following facts from the American Institute of Stress,
- About 33 percent of people report feeling extreme stress
- 77 percent of people experience stress that affects their physical health
- 73 percent of folks have stress that impacts their mental health
- 48 percent of people have trouble sleeping because of stress
Getting some emotional room from wedding stress
Just like being nervous when we stand up in front of people to exchange your vows, wedding stress is made worse or can be calmed down by our attitude towards it. When we can calm your stress down, we’ll have more mental and emotional “room” to have more fun, and find the good. You can create wonderful memories and strengthen your bond with your partner.
Calming down around stressful situations is certainly not easy to do, holy cow, no it’s not. In my own experience, once I get caught up in stress, trying to change it is like trying to stop a Mack truck with faulty brakes going down a mountainside in Tennessee. My mind feels like it’s on a runaway track. So we need to stop wedding stresses before it mows us over and we get more stressed.
Suggestions to help manage your unique wedding tension
A perspective mantra
- Stress is caused because we’re way out in our imagination into an unknown future. And weddings are something we have a lot of imagination around, both positive and negative. Wedding stress can be shiny or dull and dirty. Something happens and we are sure this or that is going to follow. Sometimes this IS true. But many times we think we know what’s going to happen but until we’re actually in the moment, we DO NOT know what’s going to happen.
You’ve heard the saying, turn the other cheek? This doesn’t mean let yourself get beaten up because you’re supposed to give them another angle to punch you. What it does mean is change your perspective in order to calm wedding stresses.
Make this your perspective changing mantra: I don’t know what will happen or what this means right now. I will know what I need to know when I need to know it. I look for a new and better way to look at what I’m stressed about. Example: you may get a better deal with the hotel staff you talk with tomorrow because connecting today failed.
One at a time
- Take on your tasks one at a time. I know, I know, seems like multi-tasking is the only way to go, but taking things one small step at a time will manage wedding stress more than you may think it will. To borrow a principle of the 12 Step movement – take it one day at a time. Take it one task at a time.
Pick five tasks that have to be done by the end of the week and then cross two of those puppies off. Be ruthless. What matters most is that you make a bit of progress and you can look back on your week and see that you’ve gotten more results than you thought you would. You have to start somewhere to handle wedding stress so try this for at least three weeks.
Human vs. perfect
- I tell this to my couples all the time: People understand being human more than they understand perfection. Of course, there will always be people who will judge you but it’s not the end of the world if they do. Unless you tell yourself a story that says what they think of you is more important than what YOU think of you.
MORE people understand and know how much you want everything to be perfect because they’ve been in your shoes. And they know your heart. Imperfection will endear you much more than shame you with a lot of good people. They truly want the best for you. That’s why they’re sharing your wedding day with you.
Your accomplishments are not swallowed up by a huge list of what’s not done. You’ll actually get more done when you take the stress off yourself. When the three tasks are accomplished you can add more if you want, but relish what you’ve already been able to get done.
My job as an officiant
As a professional officiant, my job is to make your wedding ceremony planning and delivery as easy for you as possible. My 34 years of experience helps take your stress away so you don’t worry that people will be bored, that you’ll be forced to accept certain ideas or procedures, and getting ahead of yourself.
If you’re looking for an officiant let’s get together on the phone and talk about the best ways I can help you.
Warmest regards, Rev. Crystal